I think that tonite I became the president of our Home Owners Association.
"How in the hell could that happen?" one might ask. The quick answer is that I'm a sucker who likes to be in charge of stuff, no matter how stoopid the stuff. The long answer is that I'm a sucker who likes to be in charge of stuff.
I believe that I shall close traffic on our street, declare that our county must pay for our expenses out of the homeland security budget, and that my spouse shall wear Oscar de la Renta to the ball. Join me or be left behind.
Can I call it a mandate if nobody else wanted the job?
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6 comments:
Hail to the chief. I have a picture of you as Home Owners Assoc President where you are like Galadriel imagining what would you would be like if you got the One Ring. But it wouldn't end there.
First step towards being Senator Miss Kate.
I will wear Oscar de la Renta to the ball as soon as someone tell me what the hell that means.
You need a limo, someone to carry the football, a red phone, someone with sunglasses to stand next to you staring blankly and a code name. Beware of those who will choose to differ with your dicisions. They are evildoers. Bring freedom to your neigboring communities. Don't be afraid to change the rules regulating your power to assure your decision remain unchallenged.DC
As far as code names go, I prefer the simple and clear "She Who Must Be Obeyed."
This sheds a whole new light on your reign as GLISSA President. Was that a mandate too?
First order of business is create rules. 1. No burping at meetings. 2. If you disagree with the Prez., you're free to move. 3. The Prez. chair shall sit 3 inches above all others or all others' chairs shall contain no more than three legs. 4. Toasts shall be in the name of the Prez. only. 5. Discussions shall last no more than 2 minutes, anyone speaking longer will be subject to whistling, hissing and finger snapping. 6. Newcomers will be welcomed with group hugs until they freak out and never come back again. 7. No problems will be brought to the Prez that can't be solved over a good bottle of wine. 8. No recordings shall be permitted at meetings, guitars welcome. 9. Only #9 shall be permitted to yell out in the middle of heated discussions "I feel a group hug coming on."
not anonymous just blogless-
fewer leisure suits? i'm picturing said spouse in a silver oscar de la renta leisure suit at the ball. to be fair, i think that laura bush got to pick the designer herself. maybe your spouse will wear his pants and coat from the middle east.
j
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