Last summer I got to know a little boy who looks just like his mother, my sister. Before I met him, I hadn't known anyone who look so much like he belongs to me. I don't know if it's just because he looks like me/mine that I feel so connected to him, but I do know that the only other time I've ever fallen in love at first sight is when I first laid eyes on my husband, Sparklestone himself.
The joy of my life is that when I fell for Sparkle, it all worked out right. I'm not so sure that everything is gonna turn out OK with that little'un who's related to me. It weighs on me. I want to fix it but I don't have the power to do it.
Since I kicked my mother and my sister out of my life, I'm doing much better. I don't just cry all day anymore and I don't feel like I need psychotropic drugs to deal with my life. I am a healthier person without them. But they have the little boy and I can't even talk to him without going through them.
Does every family have some monumental heartache that they have to ignore in order to move on? Is this just the human condition? Am I being a big baby?
How do I harden my heart enough to keep living and yet keep it soft enough to do the right thing?
I have a video of him dancing and singing. It's one of my most prized possessions.
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6 comments:
I just don't know what to do about that boy. I think we have gone over every option and none seems to work.
My advice for you on this whole thing has always been from the point of view of what is best for you. And I think you are right that things are much better for you now that you have severed those ties.
But we can't seem to find a way to make things better for that boy without destroying you.
I don't know if it is possible.
I'm sorry.
Remember, that little boy is more than welcome to come with you when you move into our basement.
Sylow, if we take the little boy, we'll probably have to move into your basement -- out of the country.
Mexico?
Yeah, we'll keep it all on the hush-hush. btw, our house is on the way to Canada. I think their water is a little nicer than Mexico. I know their beer is better.
I used to want to keep my nephews with me so that my sister & her insane hubby wouldn't turn them into over-medicated sociopaths. The oldest one has turned out to be a sweet 16 year-old that writes love songs to his girlfriend... Does that make you feel better?
Yes, Crackhead, that makes me feel a lot better. Thank you.
And my parents are the very same people that I'm worried about messing up the little boy... I guess I can relax a little, since here I am...
It could just be so much better for him tho! ugh!
Lucky little 16-year old girlfriend!
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